You Know What’s Cool? A Bajillion Hits
You guys have probably heard of Bajillion hits (.biz) by now, but if you’re not totally jacked into the web-o-sphere like the guru-ninja-strat-master/creator of the site Alex Blagg is, don’t feel too bad, he’s the most cutting edge person of all time. The site, which lampoons social media types, is headed up by Blagg, who’s taken on the personae of the biggest new media douche the world has ever known. We all know someone whose brash bravado and preoccupation with social media buzz overrides his self awareness and social grace, and Blagg has that person in the cross hairs. He’s a cross between Mark Zuckerberg and Mark Cuban, only on elephant viagra.
BH.biz has been all over the “blogosphere” lately, and as hilarious as I think BajillionHits.biz is, I have to admit, sometimes it hits too close to home. Some other bloggers seem eager to jump on his bandwagon, as if pronouncing their awareness of how duplicitous and, well, douchey this industry can be absolves them from embarrassing behavior. The fact is, you have to drop some serious strat to win at the internet. We all want all the hits, and we all need to max out our strat. There are people who really do need Alex’s help, and I go back and forth between laughing with him, and being annoyed at my own similarities to those he’s lampooning.
After all, Blagg has been jacking mondo strat in a serious, legit way for many years now, as a blogger for Best Week Ever, and later for Buzz Media. In order to do satire this accurate, you have to know the material intimately. Even though Alex is making fun of this industry and basically blogs just like my own, his insight is peircing. Recommendation 7 on this blog post, for instance, bears a disappointing resemblance to my own Squaresville. That’s just one of many horrifying similarities I’ve found between myself and Alex’s over-the-top personae.
At the end of the day (which never happens occurs for Blagg — he’s a 25/8 machine of productivity) his edge betrays the truest insecurities of the web industry. If we’re all trying to grab the same eyeballs, then better strat is the answer to our prayers. Hiring a person who knows better than we do is the panacea to making a burgeoning industry flourish. We all want to believe the “experts” out there, because they represent the possibility that what we’re trying to achieve is attainable. And though Blagg is teasing us about our insatiable scramble for traffic, I can’t help but wonder how much he cares about the big hits himself. I’m embarrassed to admit that I do.
